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ROUTES OF REASON

In Uncategorized on June 21, 2010 at 1:51 pm

Richard Dorkins: The Voice of Reason

I am proud to be publicly associated with the Almost Definitely Atheist Bus Campaign, a brave new initiative by a North London-based group of concerned young media professionals hoping to bring the stern light of reason to bear on the murky shadows of superstition.

I was visited last week by Ms Sherry Concorde, a leading light of the Campaign. She came up with the idea of normal, reasonable bus slogans in response to the relentless tsunami of voodoo gobbledegook adorning the flanks of the nation’s public transport infrastructure. Here are some of the shocking examples she showed me:

BRING AND BUY SALE, SUNDAY 12:30, ST ASAPH’S CHURCH HALL
A MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL OUR PARISHIONERS
PLEASE GIVE GENEROUSLY TO OUR EASTER FAMINE APPEAL
CHRISTIAN AID FORTNIGHT, 12 – 24 AUGUST
MAKE POVERTY HISTORY
YOUR 50P A MONTH COULD SAVE A STARVING CHILD
COME ON, YOU TIGHTWADS, PUT YOUR HANDS IN YOUR POCKETS FOR A CHANGE

Now, some misguided people claim to find it offensive that rational, educated people should speak out publicly against medieval trash of this sort. But is it really so offensive? What utter, arrant nonsense. What is really offensive is that the faith-heads ram this nonsense down our throats endlessly. And the state lets them.

This is why I am delighted to endorse Sherry’s fun, catchy, and lighthearted slogan:

THERE IS PROBABLY ALMOST CERTAINLY NO PARTICULAR REASON TO BELIEVE IN A SUPREME BEING. SO GO ON. HAVE THAT SHAG YOU’VE BEEN PROMISING YOURSELF.

The Almost Definitely Atheist Bus Campaign has taken off with a swing which suggests it meets a crying public need to give a voice to normal, reasonable people who are fed up of being told that there are goblins under the bed, and fairies at the bottom of the garden, and all that sort of thing. I have never told such wicked fables to my daughter, Thalia, and, as a result, her night terrors have almost completely ceased, and her incisive mind and well-balanced emotional development does credit to her tender years. For example, when I explained to her about the Almost Definitely Atheist Bus Campaign, her immediate comment was:

‘Daddy, what’s a shag?’

I did my best to explain.

‘It is,’ I told her, ‘simply the normal, wonderful and innocent way in which our DNA blindly replicates itself in the endless struggle to prolong its own nauseously meaningless existence. Some misguided people – ‘

‘Oh, you mean sex,’ she replied, before adding, ‘Daddy, can I have a new bike? I mean, just, can I have a new bike? Not for my birthday or Christmas or anything. I just want a new bike. I think it will give me an evolutionary advantage over Lauren.’

It is for Thalia’ sake, and the sake of millions of other young minds like hers, that I am delighted to report that the Almost Definitely Atheist Bus Campaign has already raised £1.1m after a £1m donation from me, and London mayor Boris Johnson has promised to introduce a new fleet of bendy buses long enough to fit the slogan on the side. I hope this is the first of many such initiatives which will soon consign religion and superstition to the dustbin of history where they belong.

Richard Dorkins is Emeritus Professor of Positive Logicalism at Bill and Melinda Gates College, Oxbridge.

richdork@large.com

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  1. He he. If you liked this post, you may also be interested in generating you own bus slogan:
    http://bit.ly/abN6aj

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