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S.A.S. HERO FREED

In Uncategorized on November 30, 2012 at 8:23 am

A British SAS war hero was a free man again last night after judges overturned his conviction – for bringing home a SOUVENIR.

“It was a 1992 Iraqi-issue CZ-99 semiautomatic pistol. Oh, and 300 rounds of live ammunition,” said Private Dominic ‘Mad Bastard’ O’Shaughnessy (23).

“It was a present,” he added. “A birthday present. From an Iraqi.”

His mum Debbie said: “We’re delighted to have him back. I don’t know what this country’s coming to. What kind of sick mind would take a teddy bear off a poorly child?

“Well then.”

Pte. O’Shaughnessy had served three months in military prison for offences under the 1999 Unexplained Interest in Lethal Firearms Act. He was freed yesterday and is celebrating tonight with friends in Nottingham.

Mick Donald, of soldiers’ charity Support Our Brave Heroes, said:

“Common sense has prevailed.

“Who in their right mind would lock up a soldier for having a gun? It’s like locking up doctors for having drugs. Or locking up politicians for telling lies. They wouldn’t like that, would they? It’s political correctness gone mad.

“There’s no discipline any more.”

… AND FINALLY, IN OTHER NEWS IN BRIEF …

Ministers are considering plans to give prisoners the vote, because they’ve all been sent to jail.

Australia is now a small sandbank in the South China Sea, occasionally exposed at low tides, and shaping up nicely as a seasonal breeding ground for walrus.

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